Dog Daze....

A few posts ago i may have mentioned that one of my 3 precious dogs ATE A DOOR!  Well I figured today would be a good day to give all of my lovely readers an update on The Zoo known as My House.  Now, some readers know my dogs and some do not so I would like to spend a quick moment to do some introductions.

Hi my name is Gibson I am with my mom in this picture.  I just turned 10, I like long hikes in the mountains, eating snow and ruining doors during thunderstorms.

Hi my name is Berin.  I just turned 8.  I like to chew on Gibson's ears (mostly because my mommies don't like it), I love farting, eating and speaking with a French accent.

Hello...my name is JoJo.  I just turned 5 and my mommies forgot my birthday.  I was born in a puppy mill and therefore I have minor brain damage.  I am special. I like to do weird things like nap on Berin's feet.

Hi...we are Tracey (left) and Becky (right) we try to hold the fort down as best we can...so far the dogs are winning.

Okay so now you have met the crew.  I feel it is necessary to give a little back story with storms so maybe you can see why we don't get mad about out house being ruined every other day.

Once upon a time in an enchanted forest near Pocatello, Idaho a cute little family was hiking in the mountains.  On their way back to the car a mean old thunderstorm came rumbling over the mountain tops so Becky (above photo right side) did what any protective mother would do...she took cover with the 3 boys.  She turned around and noticed Gibson was GONE....she gasped and feared she had lost him.  It was a terrible afternoon.  Tracey raced to the trail head to meet Becky and the other 2 boys and they were frantically looking for Gibson.  He was nowhere to be found.  The girls called out to the Scotland Yard of Pocatello and all of their friends came running to help.  People were driving, speeding, and calling everywhere for Gibson.  Becky got a phone call from her mom (who lives in Salt Lake City, Utah) and mom said Gibson was locked in puppy jail!!!  HE WAS AT THE POUND!!!  Tracey (me...above left) got a call from Becky (it went something like this) "GIBSON IS IN DOGGIE JAIL MEET ME THERE YOU ARE CLOSER".  Tracey raced to the pound and... *dum dum dum* THEY WERE CLOSED!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!  Tracey banged on the door until a mean old lady answered and wouldn't let Tracey take Gibson!!!  The cries and screams were coming from around the corner and Tracey could tell that it was Gibby Bendenz (Gibson's nickname).  She begged and begged the old lady and told her she would do anything to get him out!  So Tracey paid the lady $96 for Gibsons stay in doggie jail!  He was shoved in a corner kennel in the dark and had no food!  He was so sad when Tracey arrived!  He bolted past Tracey because at that moment his mommy Becky had arrived!  We went home and all was right in the world....


Until the next storm came and this is what happened...

He was trying to get into our room and take cover

Poor puppy pants

yes...yes that is blood

So basically that's the kind of business that goes down in Casa de Hogan-Gay.  Isn't it the saddest thing you have ever in your whole life seen??????  Sigh*  I love those destructive damn dogs.  Okay gotta get ready to shut down this classroom full of students so I can get home and pack for my vacation!  Whoop!  CALIFORNIA HERE I COME!!!!

Get in where you fit in

GO SUCK A FATTY SCALE KING

Okay so I totally get that what the scale says is a complete reflection on the hard work I have put in and the food that goes in my mouth.  But everyday sometimes I just want froyo, hot tamales, or booze...YES I LOVE WINE. Oh and there is the occassional bad day that I think can ONLY be cured with a bacon cheeseburger, fries and a side of ranch!  Could I be any more disgusting?  Really. 

I wake up everyday and empty my tank then stand on the scale (imagining a world where bacocheez yum burgers make people skinny) and *news flash* THEY TOTALLY DON'T! At any rate I get on the scale praying it either says the same thing it did the day before or went down a couple of ounces.  Truth be told...I just can't do that anymore.  I want to see a difference of pounds not ounces (down not up).  So the only way I can make sure I enjoy my occasional wine night, margarita, or fun food...is to crank up the cardio and eat in moderation. (aka snack on carrots instead of hot tamales)

Yesterday I went for a run, a run I decided I will do until I don't have to walk and then I will add distance, but my run was interupted by this cute little lost dog that was chasing me came on a jog with me, but I decided to stop and call his owner and make sure he made it safely home.  So In order to make sure I had enough time to shower and not look like a homeless person for an athletics event/dinner I had to cut the mileage short.  The short cut was up a huge hill...and all I could think was "Come on Tracey make it up the hill to the sign and don't have an asthma attack because your inhaler is at home and nobody will save you"  and WHAT WHAT IN THA BUTT I MADE IT UP THE HILL.  Accomplishment for the day done.  The rest of the run home was easy peasy from there.

Anywho...back to the scale.  Today it reported 173.6.  I am so close to 160's I can taste it.  In order to spike up my cardio I think I am going to join my friend Liz and go play pick up soccer twice a week...ya know because I can.  

The big slap in the face I got was yesterday when I was looking at some photos from family vacation.  Okay I totally understand that my flowered blouse was not the best choice...but why am I bigger than the preggo lady?  My belly is all poking out and my ass is giant. It was the first time that I saw a picture of myself and really wanted to bawl my effin face off.  Ever get to a point where you think...what the hell did I do?  More like what the hell didn't I do...the answer was eat right and workout enough.  Its funny because I always think I work so hard and eat well.  yeah check these photos out and you will think  "uhhh she works out?  hahahahaha"  *i thought that too

far left is me fat ass lady.

Please note belly poking out

There are so many things wrong with this I don't know where to start.

 Anyway, I will try and update you throughout this amazeballs Labor Day weekend.  My friend Liz and I are going to Riverside California to cheer on our favorite soccer team! We will most likely eat, drink and be merry.  I'm bringing a bathing suit but wont take off my cover up...(please see pictures above).  I will be running every day to make sure my scale goes down.  Next week I want 160's BAD.  So my floppy hat and I will holla at cha laters baby.

My Life in Numbers...

Well I guess the time has come for me to put my jiggle butt on blast and let the world know what exactly is underneath all these threads...and just so you know I am scared hairless (and I'm super hairy).  I am not extremely comfy sharing this information because...welp it is literally my biggest weakness/fear/hate/insecurity you name the negative thing and that's what this is.  I hate it about myself.  #BIBLE

I have such a super amazing life I promise.  But if I were healthy (and skinny) I would walk around in spandex and a smile...and that is all. I would be totally complete.  I am constantly saying to the person closest to me (aka Becky) that I can't wait to fit into her clothes or "if I looked like you I would wear damn near nothing".  Needless to say she is super mega healthy, super mega fit, super mega sexy and super mega skinny.  (our friend Julie calls her Skelator and I am secretly ...well not so much secretly anymore JEALOUS of the nickname). 

So what is the difference between me and the skinny world?  Food.  Booze.  I am terrible at exercise. And a whole lotta numbers.

Here is the chubs we are dealing with  

                                       sidebar this information was recorded on August 15 2012                                           

Height: 5'2"

Weight: 177lbs (holy mother!)

Waist: 40" (that's nearly 2 waists)

Left Quad: 22" (what are you a power lifter)

Right Quad: 22" (please see above)

Chest: 40" (I know your boobs aren't that big)

Ass: 45.5" (baby got back)

Pants Size: 14 (WTF)

 It's cool...you can say it....DAMN THAT GIRL IS THICK!!!!

I want to like running(its the only thing that gets my weight down).  I am terrible at running.  I love hiking.  I like CrossFit.  I love food (good and bad).  I drink more than I should.  I am an emotional eater.  Food has always been a treat for me and my family.  My entire family is overweight.  I don't want to be overweight anymore.  I want my pants size in the single digits.  I don't want to be embarrassed changing in front of my partner.  I want to wear a bathing suit not shorts and a tshirt.  I want to be sexy.  I want to wear cute clothes.  Most of all I want to like what I see when I look in the mirror.

So there...there I am.  The whole bunch of chubby me.      

So here we go on our little journey.  I will randomly post about diet and exercise...mostly just continue with my day to day ramblings and nonsense.  Hopefully every few pounds you will be blessed with a sweet photo of my body changing.

So the goal here...will be to lose 30lbs.  Count Calories and exercise 4-5 times a week.

Apple Crisp that Rocks Face!!!!

We had a bunch of Granny Smith apples that looked like they were going bad soon, and since i hate hate hate Granny Smith apples raw...I decided to work on perfecting my apple crisp!  Now I have made this recipe and played with it different ways to try and make it so delish that I crave it, but I have yet to master the art...

UNTIL LAST NIGHT!

Usually Becky ends up eating all of the dish over the course of a week (because I only have the first serving and then dont like it).  YALL!!!! It was amaze and I insist you make it and make it and make it....Here is what you will need

Ingredients
5 Granny Smith Apples
3/4 Cup of flour
1 Cup of Sugar
1/2 Butter
2 Tbs of Cinnamon
Pinch of salt
1/4 Cup of Water

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees while you work!!!  Slice and peel the apples.  I cut the slices in half. (your goal is about 4 cups of apple slices)  I use an apple corer because I'm bad ass like that :)  Then you put all the apple pieces in your casserole dish and add 1/4 cup of water.  After the water has been added sprinkle a pinch of salt all on the top of the apples...I don't know why just do it.  Now...I LOVE Cinnamon so I probably go overboard but I don't care.  Sprinkle a pretty layer of the cinnamon on top of the apples and then use a spoon and mix all that yummy goodness around.  It should look like this!!!

Then in a separate bowl add your flour, sugar, and MELTED butter (i heat the butter for 25 seconds in the microwave)...butter melted is the trick here.  You can use your fingers to mix all the ingredos, but I use a swift little hand mixer just so it looks kinda chunky/gritty.  Here is another sweet tip...at this point add another fun layer of cinnamon and use a pastry spatula or spoon and mix it in there until blended.  It should look like this!!!!

Then take the flour mixture and add it to the top of the apples.  Something I tried yesterday for the first time was adding some chopped nuts to the top to the "topping",  I just randomly had some in my cupboard so I thought what the heck...might as well!!!

Here is the before picture!                                                        

And here is the after picture!

And this was my face when I was done eating!

 

PS...there are only 152 Calories per serving!  GET YOUR CRISPIN' ON!!!

Panties in Twist

Seriously people.  I have no clue what the eff my problem is but I am in a major funk-di-fied mood lately.  I literally want to eat every bad thing on the planet and all gross bad food sounds lit amazeballs.

Soccer season is upon us and maybe that's partially why.  I wish I could be in school and have a better paying job at the same time (btw neither of the previously stated things are happening).  My gym and head trainer are getting on my last effin nerve. The weather here is sucking so many over sized balls its not even close to funny and one of my dogs ACTUALLY ate a door. 

 

This makes me giggle

I just needed to do a little bitty vent situation so I could clear my head:) Thanks for listening to mini bitch fest 2012.

Tonight I'm going to get my butt kicked at crossfit, make something delish for dinner, do a facial treatment, drink a glass or wine and watch Dallas on my DVR.

Hmmmmmm that sounds nice:) Maybe I will go get a tanning membership today!!!

Hello I do have good news that was being clouded by my rainstorm of grumpiness!!!!  My friends Suzzie and Ashley are coming to visit me!!!!!  I cannot believe it is going to happen I am so excited. (they will be buying their tickets tomorrow) so I'm trying not to get too excited because as Suzzie would say "I don't want to set myself up to be sad" but for real yall...I couldn't be more excited to have visitors!!!

Here they are!  Giving each other a high five at the bar ya know...because they are so excited to see me:)

I cannot wait to start planning the awesomeness that will be happening.  I see lots of hikes, lots of fun, and possibly a beer pong tournament in our future!  BAM#

***My mood has significantly changed...thank ya mucho!***

Crafty? Si...crafty!!!

There are so many cute decorating ideas in the world and so many cool places to shop that have fun, colorful, recycled furniture.  I decided that instead of spending the money on buying cool new stuff I would spend LESS money to redo the stuff I already have! BAM!  Coll stuff getting cooler!

So we have these old funky tables that are white (legs) and light wood (tops) and they are SO 1998!  And I want some color and spice in my new house!!! 

Items I used:
(all bought at Home Depot)

100 grit & 120 grit sand paper discs (I used a sander rather than sheets because doing it manually would have sucked major balls)
2 cans of black spray paint (I used Rustoleum)
Can of paint (your brand and color favorite - I bought semi-gloss)

Here is the before pic.
Just sand lightly to get the finish coat off and then clean with a wet towel and let dry.

As soon as that was all dry I spray painted the table with a black paint.  You can use any color underneath that you want, but I wanted a black "peek-a-boo" effect...so I went with it.   

  ***before we go any further please know I have never done this before and I have zero training in design, furniture or fashion*** 

Here is another pic of the black base layer:


















And here is my finished product.  I used the mini brush to paint the corners and little crevices and the mini roller to paint on the AWESOME green!!!  I did 2 coats because the first coat looked like shit.  And I probably could have done 3 coats but I liked it where we landed.  After this paint is dry you can use a polyurethane to complete your look, and use a sheet of 120 grit sand paper to sand off the edges and little "wear" areas to give it a sweet vintage look.












So again, I would like to remind you that this is my first DIY blog post and I have already identified areas of improvement, I have never done any training in the area of decorating, painting, sanding, cutting, fashion, ummm.....etc etc.

I do get on pinterest daily and therefore feel like I am semi-qualified to be an amateur blogger.

Thank you all...and good night!

EGG-cellent

So everyday I sleep later and later...and most of the time I can only grab something fast out of the fridge before I jet off to work.  I have been wanting to make these egg muffins I keep seeing...they are Zone and Paleo friendly!! 

List of needs:
12 eggs
Veggies (your choice)...i used onions, mushrooms, and bell peppers bc that is what we had.
Non-stick cooking spray
cupcake pan

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees.


Put the eggs in a bowl and whisk until beaten well and chop your veggies to your liking (i like mine small so i don't have to taste them as much)
Spray the cupcake pan before adding the veggies

Slip your veggies into the cupcake spots and scoops some eggs in there

Stick into the oven for 30-35 minutes

(i know the picture is crooked...)

Voila!!!

You can put them in the freezer for up to 2 weeks. Take them out and stick in the microwave for 1-2 minutes and head out the door with your delish egg muffin:)  I'm also sure you can make them even more delish by choosing different ingredients...things like bacon, sausage, cheese...etc....

Have a fab day!